|
|
|
|
|
FemmeFan Weekly
A Very Hairy Issue
When you’re itching for a NFL fix even the NFL owners meetings create a sense of arousal. Sad, isn’t it?
How I would love to be a fly on the wall during the meetings.
What happens when a roomful of fat cat owners, a group of old white guys with millions of dollars invested in a game and a team, for the profitability of the enterprise, for bragging rights and ultimately for ego stroking; come together to discuss the state of their business? Do they drink Gatorade? Do they wear their teams’ jerseys? Do they go to bed by eight PM after a long day of NFL BS? Do they get along? Do they talk about each other behind their backs? Do they share dirty little secrets? Do they bad mouth the coaches and players who have given them grief over the years?
I imagine that these annual meetings are pretty much like the standard fare offered at annual corporate meetings. Lots of bad food, insincere conversation, mountains of boring information, statistics and charts, not enough sleep and way too much alcohol.
Given that these men are multi-millionaires and probably not very interesting (is it true that Al Davis needs a bib when he eats, or that Jerry Jones’ botox-riddled face makes him look eerily similar to the Joker in Batman?
Let’s see, which owner would I like to spend an evening with?
Tom Benson might be interesting; he sure seems like a party animal when he does his “Benson Boogie” after Saints home game victories.
Dan Snyder, Mr. Big Bucks might know how to have a good time.
Jerry Jones, Jerry Jones
always seems to have something to say, about everything.
Al Davis, the mystery man is from Brooklyn and that alone makes time spent with
him worthwhile. But the rest of them, not so much.
The league has placed some rather interesting issues on the agenda for this year’s meeting. One discussion possibly headed into dangerous waters is the collective bargaining agreement. Some of the other issues on the agenda this year:
Reseeding the playoffs
Using instant replay on field goals and extra points to see if a kick has gone through the uprights.
Eliminating the forceout on receptions at the sideline or back of the end zone, meaning a receiver must get two feet inbounds.
Deferring a choice for winning the opening coin toss to the second half.
Not allowing a player's hair to cover the nameplate or number on the back of the uniform, an idea brought up by Kansas City.
Results:
The
owners did pass several resolutions, including eliminating the forceout on
receptions; allowing teams to defer their decision to the second half when
winning the opening coin toss; and making field goals and extra points subject
to replay review to determine whether the ball passes over the crossbar and
through the uprights.
In addition, any direct snap from center that is untouched by the quarterback now will be a live ball; in the past it was considered a false start and the play was blown dead. The 5-yard penalty for incidental contact with a facemask has been eliminated, with the 15-yarder remaining for any grasping or twisting of the facemask.
On Tuesday, the owners approved a communication device in the helmet of one defensive player.
However, the
reseeding was not met with much enthusiasm or support from the owners.
The league's competition committee withdrew the proposal after an informal vote
sent it “down in flames,” according to New York Giants co-owner John Mara.
Atlanta Falcons, was not surprised about the lack of support for reseeding, in which a wild-card team with a better record than a division winner would play at home in the first playoff round.
“This idea we wanted to push this year to get the discussion going,” McKay said. “There were not a lot of hands up, so we withdrew the proposal for now.”
“There is the historical idea that a division champion should have a home game.”
Which was exactly why Patriots owner Robert Kraft opposed reseeding.
“I do believe if you win a division, it's good for your fans to know you will have a home game,” Kraft said. “To win a division, there is a reward and we wanted to keep that.”
There remains concern about late-season games becoming meaningless when teams already have secured their playoff positions. Commissioner Roger Goodell indicated discussions of reseeding are not dead.
“The focus I said to the competition committee is what are the alternatives we have to make sure every game is as competitive as possible,” Goodell said. “I think the debate was good.”
Playoff reseeding makes
sense to me and to some owners, but not enough to make it happen, not yet in any
case. I hope they find a way to make the playoff seedings indicative of the team
rankings and not solely based on division wins.
Case in point, the New York Giants, last year’s Super Bowl winner had to take
the long way to the championship, as a wild card team. They had a season record
of 10-6 while the Tampa Bay Bucs finished the season at 9-7 but were able to
rest their players as division winners.
Another are that bears review and evaluation is the way college players are compensated in the draft. It is an insane system. Rookies are guaranteed unholy amounts of money before they have played one second of NFL football. The injustice is even greater when it comes to first round picks. I don’t know why the NFLPA hasn’t taken a stand on this inequitable treatment on behalf of their veteran players.
It is not just unfair it is a ludicrous way of doing business.
Here’s another suggestion for all these men to consider, stop running Viagra and Cialis commercials during games. This is supposed to be a family friendly game (notwithstanding the f-bombs we hear on the air) so what does one tell ones children when they ask what an erection is, and I would like to know, what does one do if an erection does in fact last 4 hours? Call 911?
Men have control of the NFL and it is truly still a very masculine testosterone driven endeavor, over the centuries men have tried various ways to cure impotence and enhance their sexual prowess, some of them are rhinoceros horns, deer antlers, love potions and ointments. They have also blamed their wives, girlfriends and witches for their inability to… uh… um… perform. But, please if you are going to promote cures for ED how about you give women and a cure for menopausal symptoms, dryness, lack of libido and irritability, equal time?
The Hair Issue
The
owners have deferred a decision on the long hair issue until May in order to
give the players association an opportunity to provide feedback.
Here are the top five reasons why NFL players shouldn’t be allowed to wear long hair.
it’s unfair to the white bald guys
long hair might get caught in a strippers
g-string
locker room showers are backing up
shampoo and conditioner costs are excessive
hairdressers are banned in the locker room
I’m certain the NFL will
hear from those young men who have for religious, cultural or simply fashion
reasons decided to wear their hair long. This could become a contentious issue
and one that might even make or break upcoming collective bargaining
negotiations. I suggest the owners begin to broach the subject with their own
players and make sure that earning millions for a skill is the motivation for
playing the game, yes money honey, not the length of the hair.
Go spend some time with these dread lock wearing athletes as they have their
hair done, that is easily a four hour sit down.
1. Pacman Jones (when he had them)
2. Marshawn Lynch
3. Nate Webster
4. Devin Hester
5. Reggie Williams
6. Josh Cribbs
7. Ernest Wilford
8. Rashean Mathis
9. Marion Barber
10. Laurence Maroney
Add This Column To Your
Site for Free
Femmefan stands
alone in the world of Sports-related web sites, and has a large and loyal following.
Femmefan's articles, written by women and men, combine humor, and passion; with
a little "dirt" thrown in for good measure. Femmefan subscribes to the theory that
games are meant to be fun, and we are always about having a good time. Sometimes
humorous, other times edgy and provocative, but never boring -
Femmefan.com
is the premier on-line magazine for the female sports junkie (guys love us too!)
